Ask Athena: Athenian's Advice Column
Ask Athena is Athenian’s very own advice column that aims to help readers think through common challenges. Students may submit questions about all aspects of life, inside of school or out. The answers in this column are the opinions of Athenian’s patron goddess, Athena, and are not meant to serve as definitive solutions to the questions posed. Questions may be submitted at any time via pillar@athenian.org.
What should I do about a teacher that I do not have a very good relationship with?
The first thing to consider is why. Do you show disinterest in class? Do you not complete homework assignments? Make sure your participation and your work show your commitment. Attending C&C is an excellent opportunity to show interest and improve your understanding of course material. Teachers tend not to prefer students who disrespect them or what they teach. But if the teacher is treating you in a way that feels unfair, the best course of action is talk directly to them. This may not resolve the problem but it will inform the teacher that the relationship needs attention. It’s usually in both of your best interests to make sure you have a good relationship. If you’re having a serious issue you can’t resolve one-on-one, talk to your advisor about what to do next.
What should I do when my opinion goes against what a majority of the school thinks? Is it worth it to say anything if people will judge me for having a different opinion?
Open discourse allows everyone involved to develop more educated ideas, and you have the opportunity to express ideas without being shunned. If the issue is important to you, and the opportunity arises to have an open conversation, share your ideas but also show respect. Just as you are smart, capable, educated and secure in what your life experiences have taught you, so is the other person. There is always room to learn and grow and engage in productive discourse. With that said, people’s minds are difficult to change. This has been proven time and time again by behavior heuristics such as confirmation bias. Be prepared for opposing points of view. If you want to stand by your opinion, think critically about whether your beliefs are driven by logical and coherent reasons. When you speak about your beliefs, aim to show a new perspective, even if you cannot convince them. Your goal should not be to have others suddenly agree with everything you say, but for them to respect your point of view. If you aren’t confident in your reasoning, don’t say anything. But if you think you can present your idea in a way that sheds new light, it is absolutely worth it to express your opinions.
How can we not have terrible mental health while going to a school that is so difficult (and don’t give me self-care, go for a walk)?
DISCLAIMER: This is an advice column asked and answered by students. Responses should not be considered qualified medical advice. If you are having an issue with mental health, please lean on adult members of our community like our upper school counselor, Rose Stoloff, or please consult an outside mental health professional.
Mental health challenges can occur for many reasons. In some (not all) cases, finding strategies to proactively manage potentially stressful situations can be helpful. As an example, if some of your mental health struggles stem from a sense of feeling overwhelmed by the Athenian course load, you might consider rethinking how you manage your time.
Self-care may be a good way to manage stress that’s already set in, but it doesn’t necessarily solve the root causes of stress. Though workload management strategies might not be simple to think through and implement, making small changes in lifestyle and habits can make a big difference.
Personally, I’ve found that the best way to improve my own mental health has been to manage my time well while doing homework. I do this by regulating myself into not getting distracted (watching YouTube, looking at social media, etc.), and not procrastinating. I find that the best way to finish homework is to get into a “zone” where I’m very productive and sustain this flow for as long as possible. If you try this, you can take breaks if you feel it will help your productivity, but I find breaks to be disruptive. As with all attempts to find life hacks, use trial and error and do what works for you. Hopefully, once you reduce feelings of overwhelm, you can also have time for activities that help you relax.
