Nine Religious Students and Faculty Share Their Experiences in Athenian’s Secular Environment

To the mind of many faithful, few things are more important than their religion. How those beliefs interact with Athenian, a secular and pluralistic institution, can lead to everything from confrontation to cooperation to synthesis.

12th-grader Zara Alam is a Muslim who’s engaged in her religious community both at her mosque and at Athenian, where she is the leader of the Muslim Student Union. Her beliefs are sometimes at odds with the non-religious parts of society she’s involved in.

“I think that Athenian is a very secular school, which isn’t bad, because we live in in a secular country and we live in a secular society, but I think that the problem is when we promote inclusivity but we never include religion in that conversation,” said Zara.

Specifically, one of the key flashpoints between religious people and secular society is LGBTQ issues. 

Zara said, “The difficulty is that a lot of people with religious beliefs believe there are two genders. Like that is what they are taught. That God created a man, and that God created women. And so there are cases obviously when they’re intersex, right, that’s a different case. The problem is when it comes to identity. There’s this battle of I can respect someone’s pronouns while also having someone understand that this is my belief system. I think the main difference is that this respect versus support. A lot of religious people do not support certain things, but we misconstrue that for respect, because you can respect everyone and you should respect everyone.”

12th-Grader Clare Middlemiss is a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, or, as it is more commonly known, the Mormon church. She’s experienced the same tension as Zara over this issue.

“There is a lack of respect to a certain degree of of religions. Like, we respect people’s identities to a certain point like Zara said, with specifically LGBTQ stuff is very protected, but religious stuff can be questioned. I don’t know. I’ve gotten a lot of weird questions about religion that would be entirely inappropriate to ask someone,” said Clare.

For example, Clare said: “I’ve been asked what number wife your mother is. Not as a joke, they were being serious.”

Additionally, religion is increasingly seen as oppressive and detrimental to society. Zara said: “I’ve also heard opinions thats the hijab specifically is a form of oppression.”

That could be why religion is deprioritized in favor of LGBTQ beliefs.

“With our current society and what we’re striving towards, it doesn’t really seem like religion is in that vision, and I think that’s how people act towards me, if that makes sense,” said Zara.

Zara believes that this problem could be solved by promoting dialogue between the two belief systems and fostering greater understanding of religion. Specifically, in school, that can take the form of classes.

“We have a course that’s World History I think it’s called. We don’t talk about religion much in that course, but when we do it’s very brief, which is ok. But I think the only thread we have towards more respect in that regard is Gabe’s philosophy classes. I think upon taking those courses it’s made me feel more confident being a person of religion,” Zara said.

Zara said, “Gabe’s classes make you realize that you can technically, through philosophy, prove the existence of God. And religion is a way to access God.”

In Gabe’s classes, she also learned that the classic science versus religion dichotomy is not as black-and-white as it seems.

“Everyone is worshiping something to some degree, whether you’re worshiping God, or your grades, but my point is that we take science as the number one truth, when science is primarily based on theories and hypotheses. Even though we can say this is some percent accurate we can never take something as a fact because we don’t know 100 percent,” Zara said.

Clare’s advice to people seeking to bridge the gap and learn more about religion is: “Go to church. Honestly I would advise people to try it, see what it’s like. And maybe get more perspectives from religious friends and talk to them without judgment. I feel like people use religion as a joke a lot even when they’re religious, so I feel like more serious conversations never happen.”

For Zara, another part of better religious tolerance at Athenian would take the form of some changes in the cafeteria.

“I think we should have halal meat at Athenian. That’d be really nice so I can actually have the rice and chicken,” said Zara.

Gabe Del Real has been at Athenian for 30 years, and he’s been a practicing Roman Catholic for all of it. While his faith has not changed, Athenian’s perceptions of it have.

“Initially, I felt like there was a preconceived notion that practicing or being religious was contrary to being rational or intellectual. I think that was sort of a common opinion, especially among students with regard to what they considered Christianity to be, which was primarily characterized as fundamentalist Christianity. But you know, as time has gone on, and in fact, one reason why I'm here is that the fundamental principles underneath the founding and the curriculum, and the philosophy of the Athenian school are a lot more Catholic than I think a lot of people realize,” Gabe said.

Specifically, Gabe said, “There used to be a method of teaching called the Baltimore Catechism, and it was a series of questions and answers. The first question in the Baltimore Catechism was: who made you? And the answer was God made you. The second question was: for what purpose did God make you? And the answer was: to know and to love Him. When Dyke Brown talks about intellectual fitness and moral virtue, he is talking about knowing the good and doing the good. Which, whether it's from a philosophical point of view or from a Christian theological point of view, is going to end up in the same place. And that is pure form, God, whatever you want to call it.”

For Aristotle, moral virtue is justice, which is rendering what is due to make someone whole. But, that’s only possible based on knowledge of that other person. Thus, intellectual fitness’s purpose is justice. According to Gabe, Christianity agrees, but would take it further.

Gabe said, “Christianity would say the same thing. Now, the difference is that, that in Christianity, justice is perfected by charity. That is to say unconditional love. And there's nothing mentioned about that in our in our mission. And it wouldn't be because that's not a philosophical proposition. However, we can philosophically, from an Athenian point of view, talk about the relation of pursuing justice, to the love of the good, and to the love of the common human nature that all humans possess, which can be understood by reason. It doesn't require belief to understand that there's a common humanity and that we are in the pursuit of our own fullness, call to promote the fullness of other people and things right hence, environmentalism, hence, international understanding, hence, community service, right. So those are natural outcroppings. Practical outcroppings of the pursuit of intellectual fitness. Well, you know, Christian ethics says the same thing.”

Although Gabe cannot appeal to Christianity at Athenian, and thus cannot talk about parts of the religion like charity, he has stayed because it has other benefits nonetheless.

“In some ways, what Athenian was trying to do was ethically a lot more Catholic than what a lot of Catholic schools do. And I felt like it maybe this is this is revealing the dirty little secret. I felt like I could introduce students to the Catholic intellectual tradition in a more intellectual way here than I could add a lot of Catholic schools. Having gone through Catholic schools, I know that, and having been a religion teacher, theology teacher, that there unfortunately isn't always a lot of good Catholic education going on in those schools, ironically. Because the preconceived notion is that somehow faith is about feeling and faith is about emotions. And faith is about, you know, you kind of have to check your brain at the door. And admittedly, the tradition in which I was trained as a Catholic student and teacher in the tradition of, of Aristotle and Thomas Aquinas, etc, is considered conservative and old school among Catholic circles,” Gabe said.

Catholicism is often seen as conservative, with traditionalist views on marriage and abortion. Another advantage of Athenian, for Gabe, is that Catholicism cannot appeal to faith in these conversations and instead must engage them philosophically. Reason-based discussion can lead to broader perspectives for the Church and help Catholics learn to defend their positions.

Gabe said, “And so all we can do is continue to consider thorny ethical issues, to the degree that reason allow us to. For instance, when life begins, that's philosophically an open question. That it is as close to conception as possible, seems to be a pretty rational position, but that definitively and without question that it is conception, you know, people who are going to take that stance are going to have to understand that they're part of a community that has a pluralistic conversation, that you're going to have people who don't take that for granted. For me, the issue, especially of sexual identity and gender identity, is something that in some ways, I think, the Church needs to take, albeit slow, but sure steps toward an opening. I think we know more about human psychology and sexuality. And I think as I've said before, you know, among the myriad ways in which humanity expresses itself that it expresses itself in a sexual and gender spectrum seems to make sense.”

Gabe agrees that religion needs more representation at Athenian, and he thinks that the school’s aversion towards it comes from a fundamental misunderstanding: religion does not have to be taught from the perspective of faith.

“There's a difference between the history of religions, religion, and theology. History of religions is just that: it's history. It's looking at it from an outsider's point of view. And therefore you would refer to all of them as mythical traditions, as I do in a lot of my classes. I talk about the Christian mythology or the Muslim mythology, whatever it might be. And exploring what the patterns are, in those expressions, what the what the commonalities are, and how long this has been happening in our human history, and how it happens. How does it manifest itself in ritual activity? We could easily do that,” said Gabe.

12th-grader Rohan Ganapavarapu is a Hindu, but he doesn’t practice very strictly. That’s not something unique to him—it’s more of a built-in feature of the religion than anything.

“Hinduism’s not very orthodox, it’s sort of a loose set of practices. I would say that’s why it’s pretty easy to practice at Athenian,” Rohan said.

12th-grader Anay Pant also practices Hinduism, and he agrees with Rohan’s emphasis on the fluid nature of the faith. He thinks that gives the religion continuity with Athenian’s values, which also emphasize unconventional ideas and dialogue between all perspectives.

“I think that there's a sense of embracing new ideas. There's a lot of people who practice Hinduism, who don’t really follow all the guidelines, or they don't like one of the rules, like, you cannot eat meat on Tuesdays for religious reasons. A lot of people like myself, I don't follow that.” Anay said, “But I do follow the very common one is that you cannot eat beef. And that is one of the guidelines that almost everyone follows. But I think Hinduism is, and people specifically are very embracing of those rule breakers. They're still Hindus. And I think Athenian is like that, we value people thinking differently, different perspectives.”

That’s led to Rohan feeling at home as a Hindu at Athenian.

“I would say [Athenian] is pretty supportive. In South Asian Representation, there’s a lot of Hindus. I would say there’s definitely a Hindu community here, albeit a small one. Sometimes there’s beef for life, beef and pork, but there’s generally good salad options,” Rohan said.

Athenian’s culture is overall very compatible with Hinduism, but one minor issue the two disagree on is the closeness between teachers and students.

Anay said, “I disagree a little bit with how much Athenian students see their teachers as just another person. I think there’s a bit of disparity in terms of I cannot go to any teacher, and obviously I’m not going to insult the teacher, but I think in Hinduism, seniority in terms of age or like wisdom is very valued. I definitely don’t think we have to go to that extreme, because most schools do that where teachers are very strict, their students are very listen to the teacher on everything, but I think something Athenian could adopt is a way to have more respect towards our teachers.”

12th-grader Didi Jack is a Protestant Christian, and Christianity has been part of his academic life even before attending Athenian.

“A lot people don’t know this but before I came to Athenian I went to a Christian school. So Christianity, for me, is a lifestyle.” Didi said, “It’s believing in the Lord and living your life in his image as best you can. It’s bettering yourself, it’s becoming a better person, it’s treating people how you want to be treated, it’s respecting others.”

Didi said, “I believe that Christians are very well-supported at Athenian. I have the unique experience of being a boarder, and in the boarding community, there’s shuttles to church on Wednesdays and Sundays every week. So yeah, I believe we’re really supported and really have an opportunity to embrace our faith.”

Despite Athenians being generally accepting of the Christian faith, there are plenty of misconceptions about what exactly that faith professes.

“I don’t think [perceptions of Christianity] are accurate, because I feel like a lot of people don’t know a lot about Christianity beyond just Jesus. I don’t people really know the values or take the time to learn about the religion, which I don’t feel they have to, but I just think that causes them to not have an accurate view of Christianity,” said Didi.

Specifically, Didi said: “People judge you based on learning that you’re a Christian because the school is so liberal and assume that just because you’re a Christian you must be some sort of ‘ist’ or perpetuate some sort of ‘ism.’”

Instead, Didi argues that Christianity rightly understood promotes the exact opposite of its stereotypes.

Didi said, “I feel like a lot of people just assume that Christianity means you’re judgmental and you’re not open minded, and that you’re really not open to meeting people with different beliefs than you. I don’t really think that’s the case. A huge value of Christianity is loving others and bettering yourself. That means kindness, being generous.”

Ultimately, the Christian values Didi speaks of fit very well with what Athenian is trying to do.

“I feel like Athenian’s values and the stuff they put out there are very positive, and I see it as a lot of stuff thats very good for individuals and the community as a whole, and it brings people in. I would say Athenian does a really great job at honoring a lot of [Christian] principles,” Didi said.

Buddhism is unique among world religions in that it can be practiced strictly as a philosophy, or along with faith-based rituals. For Leslie Cushner, her Buddhist practice is mostly secular, but not entirely.

Leslie said, “I didn't grow up in a religious Buddhist household that incorporated Buddhist rituals. And while I do do some Buddhist rituals, the ritual practice is not a main part of my practice. So I just like to differentiate that because I know my friends who have grown up Tibetan, for them, there is a lot of religious practice.”

Buddhist practice is often misunderstood, so Leslie clarifies it as follows: “Buddhism is a tradition that explores the problem of suffering. The problem, to quote Ruth King, is that things are not permanent, personal, or perfect. That life is often difficult because of impermanence and because of our own clinging to ourself. We’re protecting the self, and that Buddhism provides a path for living a more peaceful life and moving towards happiness and liberation.”

Leslie was not raised Buddhist and begun to learn about it as a purely academic pursuit. Despite her field’s disdain for practitioners, which it saw as non-objective, Leslie found that she was able to apply what she was studying to her life.

“I was India and I was studying Tibetan, and I met this teacher who was talking about refuge. He was like, ‘Yeah, refuge is a shelter, and it’s a safe place for all the ups and downs of our world, but what’s different about Buddhist refuge, is that that refuge is in your mind, so you actually train your mind to be a safe place to think about things that are very difficult. And as someone who had dealt with clinical depression, I have really experienced a lot of ups and downs. And I often felt like life was a roller coaster. It was like being thrown around by waves or being thrown around by a roller coaster. I just felt like there was no peace. I felt like I was very reactive to everything that came my way. And I just wanted there to be an easier way to be in the world,’” said Leslie.

At Athenian, Buddhism is well-tolerated, but this could be because people know so little about it that it rarely butts heads with anything else.

Leslie said, “I think that people don't know whether Buddhists believe in God or not. I would call Buddhism non-theistic. But there are definitely forms of Buddhism that are theistic. But for the most part, I've had people be very pleasantly curious. I think that Buddhism has a kind of pleasant, New Age-y feel that people are curious about. I don't think they think it’s a serious discipline until they try and practice meditation. I think until you try and practice meditation you can’t really understand Buddhism, and meditation can be very challenging, and I feel like it can be very beneficial whether you’re Buddhist or not.”

Despite this, Athenian seems to have adopted practices that are very close to Buddhist ones.

“The idea of AWE is a very Buddhist experience. In fact, it's a lot like a Buddhist retreat, except, physically more taxing.” Leslie said, “I think that the relationship between students and teachers here is very much like Buddhism where traditionally you have a teacher who helps guide you through. I think that Athenian more than other schools I've worked at, like students have teachers that they're really connected to, we become mentors for them,” Leslie said.

Athenian, however, being a school founded on Western culture, inevitably will clash with an Eastern philosophy like Buddhism. One of Buddhism’s central claims is that the ego, or self, does not exist, because people change so constantly that there is nothing unifying across every moment. Part of the solution to suffering is to recognize the illusion of the ego, which Athenian could improve on.

“One thing about Athenian I would say, that isn't very Buddhist, and that’s challenging, is how much how much ego-clinging there, how much self centeredness, how much competitiveness there is. And our whole approach, which is very goal-oriented, and obsessed with college, is, like in Buddhism, we say that the path is the goal. And I really think that the best part of the Athenian education is the path, not the goal,” Leslie said.

Leslie proposes a radical solution, albeit one that has already appeared in a few other schools: “Getting rid of grades would, I think, help a lot with the path being the goal. It would help people focus more on learning and not so much on achievement, and not comparing themselves to others.”

Athenian, in its quest to help students learn how to be happy and find meaning, could benefit from the use of Buddhist practices.

Leslie said, “There's not enough self-awareness training. One of the things that Buddhism teaches us is, how to train our minds, how to understand our thoughts and emotions. I think it's really amazing to see kids who are like fluent in other languages or taking multivariable calculus, but like, if you ask them ‘what is your purpose here?’ They maybe haven't thought about it. We spent so much time thinking about content, but so little time reflecting on what it all means.”

Buddhists are also often vegetarian, as their philosophy emphasizes the importance of ceasing suffering for all beings, not just humans.

Leslie said, “I wish that Athenian were totally vegetarian, which I know is like the most controversial thing I've said. And like, it would not be a big deal, if it were vegetarian, at least for lunch. I mean, I know that boarders who live here want to eat meat, now and then. And then but like, why not? We have an environmental pillar. We feel better about ourselves when we aren't perpetrating cruelty.”

12th-grader Neal Chohan is a Sikh, and his summary of his religion is as follows:

“Monotheistic, stand up for others, be bold, community.” Neal said, “We believe in God, but it doesn’t take a human form. It’s just all-encompassing. Kind of like pure being in Gabe’s class, but I don’t think it shares all the same things with that. What’s interesting is that it’s not just the religion that’s Sikhism, but it’s just a culture too. So along with just worshiping God, there are warrior values, there are five things that you have to have on you. I don’t practice all that. I’m not fully practicing Sikhism, but it’s what I believe in.”

Sikhism is relatively rare at Athenian, and Neal recognizes that.

“It’s kind of hard that there are no other Sikh people here, or at least there are no other Sikh people close to me in terms of grade level, but I guess it would be nice to have some community,” Neal said.

However, Neal has been able to adapt, with the help of Sikhism’s distinctively pluralistic belief system: “I believe that all religions are just different languages for the same thing, which is to have faith in God.”

In line with his inclusive tradition, Neal thinks that believing in God is helpful to provide moral values, but he doesn’t care how anyone arrives at that belief. Athenian should embrace both parts of that ideal.

Neal said, “I think Athenian should have more religious values, but religions should be free to practice by anybody.”

However, despite the fact that there are not many Sikhs at Athenian, many of the school’s cultural values line up with those of Sikhism.

“Sikhism actually practices stand up for others who aren’t able to stand up for themselves. So I think stuff like DEIS, just helping marginalized groups, stuff like that really goes in line with our values,” said Neal.

However, Neal thinks that Athenian still has some work to do when it comes to controversial world events.

Neal said, “I think Sikhism says to never stop talking when you see something you think should be different or changed. Because silence is a form of acceptance, right. I would like to see less silence and more discussion about world events.”

12th-grader Benjie Katz is ethnically Jewish and has recently embraced his faith fully.

“I've been a religious Jew since the beginning of my junior year. And I'd say that in general it has been very positive. I think that the way that students that Athenian interact with religion is is driven out of curiosity and not out of any ill-intent. I think that's the main thing to consider is that, whereas in other institutions I might have felt, in some way, discriminated against or belittled, but I think that here, because it's such a knowledge driven institution, people are really curious about who you are, what you believe in. The people are just really driven by curiosity. I think that within the last six months or so, since October 7, for sure, I think it's gotten harder and harder to be a proudly Jewish and be proudly pro-Israel. I think that's that's become more and more difficult because I think that there is a certain relationship between Israel and Judaism and you feel that when one weakens you feel both begin to,” Benjie said.

Benjie identifies himself as a Modern Orthodox Jew, which is a tradition that attempts to synthesize the revelation of the Torah with science and secular education. That’s why, despite his faith-based knowledge, Benjie recognizes the value of attending a non-religious school like Athenian.

Benjie said, “I think that religion can be used in a number of ways. I use it as a community establisher, and as a source of value direction, but I don't treat it as a source of objective knowledge. Like, I wouldn't use a biology textbook to determine whether humans ought to be treated equally, right, there are really wrong things about that. And it has been historically used, right. That would be wrong. It would just be as wrong to use the Bible to figure out how long creation took. So I think that they have to go hand in hand because they're addressing two very different questions. One is, what is true around you in terms of nature, and the other is what is true in terms of the right and moral way to act and behave yourselves amongst a community.”

The moral framework that Judaism provides, however, is more lenient than it is usually interpreted by Athenian’s secular community.

“But there’s this commandment that you’re not supposed to have homosexual relations, it’s based on certain interpretations of Leviticus. And there was a man that came to the rabbi and said: ‘Rabbi, I have this problem. Like, I don't feel like I can really stop it. This is who I am.’ And the rabbi said: ‘That's fine. There are about 612 other commandments in the Torah, go do any one of them. You know, it's this is one that you feel like you can't do. That's fine.’ Much like if someone else said: ‘You know what, I have to eat pork.’ Okay, you have to eat pork. You have the pork. But it's not a do or die, right,” said Benjie.

For Benjie, religion is a personal journey that can help to imbue one’s life with purpose.

Benjie said, “My personal philosophy is that humans are fueled by their needs their need to justify their own existence, and that every single human interaction, every single human behavior can always be tracked to that presupposition, not the one in which power is what all people want. All humans want to justify their own existence.” Benjie said, “My religion, I think that I think it's very much in the same way that God plays an essential role in our lives is a way in which we justify our existence, right? I am here because God put me here, and I will do good in his name. You know, that's a very, depending on how you rephrase that, in essence, that's a very religious concept, right?”

Due to religion’s subjective role in each individual’s life, Benjie is wary about imposing his beliefs onto others.

Benjie said, “I only I judge myself and because I uphold that standard, not for others, but for myself and how I'm supposed to act. Right? I think that it's not fair for me to apply religious values to the rest of the world. It's very narrow thinking. And it's just kind of wrong. Because our basic presuppositions are very different, right? Someone's is going to be like, God doesn't exist and the world is meaningless, and that's fine. And that's one idea. And then the other is like, “Oh, well, I think God put us here for a reason. So we don't hump other guys.” You know, whatever. These are both basic presuppositions, but it's not fair for me to apply one to you and force you to live by it. So, are there certain things that people do that I wouldn't do based on my personal morals that were established by biblical text? Sure, but am I going to apply that same standard to other people that don't hold the same presupposition? No.”