Ask Athena: Senior Edition
For this issue, the graduating editors of The Pillar decided to give Athena a break and stepped in to answer readers’ questions. Some correspondants requested that a specific editor answer their questions, while others were chosen by the editors themselves, including one—the first question—that was chosen twice.
Q: How are you supposed to figure out who you are and what you want to do with your life? (Michael)
Even after finishing the college application process and preparing to embark on a new adventure, I can only wish that I knew the answer to this question. To be truthful, discovering who you are is a lifelong process—there is no certainty to which you can fully say that you have found yourself. For me, I’m entering college with the expectation that I’m going to switch my major or pick up a hobby that may become an essential aspect of my life. I guess that my piece of advice to this question is to continue remaining true to yourself and the belief that there is always more in you that you can discover. You may not figure out exactly what you want to do in your life until after graduating college, or maybe you already have. However, it is essential that you remain open to pursuing any opportunities that may reveal themselves, as they will allow you to connect with others who will mentor you through discovering who you are and what your “purpose” is in life. Furthermore, please don’t set the expectation that you have to follow a path that your parents want you to follow. This is your opportunity to discover who you are and only you yourself will be able to determine that. There will be certain situations where your parents won’t be able to provide you with the specific guidance you need; in that case, you just have to take a leap of faith and trust that no matter where you go, you’ll ultimately find your true happiness. The final piece of advice I want to provide through answering this question is to try not to let your form of defining yourself and discovering who you are revolve around comparing yourself to the success of your peers. Throughout my high school experience, I’ve often felt like I was inferior to my friends, because of all of the accomplishments and extracurriculars they pursued outside of class. While it is helpful to motivate yourself and expand your comfort zone, don’t feel like answering the question of who you are and what you want to do solely comes from whether or not you are above your peers. This is your opportunity to find yourself; explore things at your own pace and have faith that you will be able to discover yourself by being adventurous and challenging yourself on your own accord.
Q: How are you supposed to figure out who you are and what you want to do with your life? (Everett)
It’s interesting that this question is actually two questions linked together. I think it implies something true—namely, what you want to do with your life is helpful to figure out who you are. The two questions are different due to the fact that “who are you” is somewhat philosophical: it requires an understanding of what constitutes the definition of a person. A person’s life goal may be a large part of that definition, but not all of it. Nevertheless, it’s still very helpful to inform your answer to the first question. Meanwhile, “what do you want to do with your life” is a more practical consideration. It requires trial and error, rather than beginning with speculation. I don’t know how to define a person, but I can try to help you with different approaches of solving the second part of the question, in hopes it helps inform you with the first. And, ultimately, what you do in your life is the only important thing, because no matter what the end goal of human life is, whether it’s happiness or acting morally (or if they’re the same), that can only be actualized by action. Thus, who you are is only important insofar as it informs what you want to do. I’ve always known what I want to do, although what I have wanted to do has changed over time. When I was younger, I was absolutely sure I wanted to be an inventor, but I definitely don’t want to do that anymore. However, throughout each “phase” I’ve been in, my prospective job became my purpose—I was constantly sketching diagrams all the way back in elementary school as practice for the future, and wanting to be involved with politics got me into debate and to try hard in ninth grade history while most people were just trying to get by. The reason these phases were so motivating to me is because I decided to start them due to an inherent drive I have in me to make as much of an impact on the world or history as I possibly could. I don’t know why, how it developed, or what caused it, but it’s been there for as long as I can remember.
Q: Zach Jarvis, can you tell me the meaning of life? (Zach)
Edgy third graders used to confidently tell me the that the scientific meaning of life was to have babies. However, this notion is inherently contradictory; it assumes that meaning must based on our biological nature, but any scientific answer must fall flat because science is definitionally not metaphysical (while this question is). In other words, science can only tell us what we can do, not what we should do. So let's put that silly notion behind us.
Instead, I would posit that the meaning of life can be found by weighing two concepts that are not necessarily in conflict. First, we should strive to maximize our own being, and second, we should strive to maximize the being of others. To maximize “being” is not merely a material idea. There is also an element of personal fulfillment which must be satiated for one to be as fully as one can. I believe this personal element is unique to each person, and must be discovered through trial and error, although there are some common interests most people seem to share. So to answer your question, the meaning of life is to pursue that which brings you fulfillment and try to aid others in achieving fulfillment too, whether that comes from art, or relationships, or writing. I believe it is imperative that you follow your passions, so long as they don’t affect others' ability to follow theirs.
Q: How do I ask a girl out if she's friends with my ex? (Everett)
Any answer to this question will always be very complex and situational. Because of the nature of anonymous questions, we don’t have much background information to work off of. To solve this problem, I’ve made a flow chart to account for all the possible scenarios. Regardless, take this advice with a grain of salt, given that there are many nuances and complexities in real life that can’t be reduced down to a chart.
Q: Why did Jay-Z cheat on Beyoncé? (Zach)
This question raises a few obvious follow-ups, and those follow-ups beg for further follow-ups. Allow me to explain. First, when did Jay-Z cheat on Beyoncé? What does it mean to cheat? What does it say about modern society that we care whether he cheated? How do we know he cheated? What does it mean to know? What does it mean to know, especially given that—much like Jay-Z’s romantic partners (allegedly)—the world around us is constantly changing? Why is cheating wrong? What does it mean for something to be wrong? Can beings be bad, if being is inherently good? How should we live a good life? Could one use Jay-Z and Beyoncé as a case study for how to live a good life? What does it mean for Jay-Z to have cheated on Beyoncé if the past exists only in one’s mind? I believe these musings should begin to provide some elucidation, though not necessarily in relation to the above question.
Q: What is the connection between Across the Spider-verse and the Bhagavad Gita? (Aiden)
Both the Spider-verse and Gita navigate the tension between individuality and unity. The Bhagavad Gita, a 700-verse Hindu script written in the second half of the first millennium BCE, consists of the dialogue between Krishna, the avatar of Vishnu, and the prince Arjuna. Facing an impending war with his kin, Arjuna vacillates between his personal relationship and his obligation as the state’s leader.
Unable to decide, the prince seeks Krishna’s advice. To Arjuna’s question, Krishna reveals to him the structure of the universe—the caste—and his position within it as Kshatriya, the warrior class. Krishna counsels Arjuna to fulfill his duty from his class thereby being in union with the cosmic order. This submission of individuality to unity is prevalent in various Eastern traditions.
On the other hand, in the second movie of the series Across the Spiderverse, the protagonist Miles Morales is confronted with a similar dilemma to that of Arjuna. He has to choose between saving his father and securing the canon event, which its interruption can collapse the entire multiverse. Confronting this conflict between individuality and unity, Miles asks the question, “Can we do both?” The answer to the possibility of the coexistence of individuality and unity will discussed in the last chapter of the trilogy, “Beyond the Spiderverse.”
Q: What was your favorite part of being at the Athenian? Like out of all four years what was the best experience about Athenian for you? (Aiden)
Undisputably, my favorite part of being at Athenian has been its people. My friend who is an alumnus recalled the the place as “a lovely corner of the earth,” and I agree. In my first year at Athenian, I had to not only live through a foreign culture, people, and language but also through the pandemic. The only reason I was able to not merely survive but experience moments of joy through and coming out of those difficult times is the care and love adults and students on the campus have gifted to me. This was especially a transformative experience for me because I experienced the opposite extreme in my childhood in Korea. Everything went quickly, so everyone was busy trying to catch up with the speed and not be left behind. I worried about getting into colleges and buying houses since I was in elementary school. Like being in a race car, everything except your life fades away when you focus on your future so much.
Having two more years of life did ease academic challenges and gave me room to breathe, but it was the people, the community Athenian had, that helped me to recognize that there is more in this world than just myself. It was a grounding experience because before coming here I felt like I was trying to walk on water: you cannot, so you sink, ceaselessly shuffling your legs so that you would not submerge. Only after having a ground to rest on I was able to slow down and look around and within myself, and discover things I like from philosophy to ceramics to cooking to simply talking with people. After my four years here, I feel much more calm, grateful, open, flexible, and compassionate, and I would accredit all my growth and joy to those who have supported me through my journey. I have met good people here.
